Hire Michael Jackson’s personal physician (he just might be available)

Much blame has been laid at the feet of Dr Conrad Murray but his patient’s weight was just 110 lbs at the time of his death. He should have weighed 140lbs by most medical standards. Clearly, Dr. Jackson is pushing back these medical standards and may even be a medical genius. Jackson was actually able to complete 10 grueling auditions prior to his death and Dr Murray is sure to have some interesting views on “Ideal Weight” and diet.